Your family may be arguing for a variety of reasons, but most of it may be attributed to stress, anxiety, and even a lack of communication. It is ideal to get down as a family and address the difficulties you all perceive to be occurring around the house, as well as come up with a solid solution. If your family doesn't stop fighting, then you should probably seek help from a professional.
It's very normal for families to argue from time to time. If your parents aren't battling between themselves at home, you could be arguing with them. Perhaps you're disagreeing with your siblings as well. It might feel like you're living in a warring family at times. However, this isn't always the case. Families that don't argue sometimes have lost people in their lives who had a big influence on why families fight.
If your parents were separated when you were young, they probably didn't get to learn how to argue properly. They may have taken each other's views seriously, but not their own. This can cause problems when they come together at home again. Sometimes one or both of them may try to force their partner/sibling/partner's child to do what they want by yelling or using punishment. This can hurt those feelings and make them think they're not worth caring for.
If your family fights often, it's best if you take time out of your day to stop and reflect. Are there any arguments that you could win? Maybe call an uncle or aunt and ask them for help?
Ultimately, families fight because they care about each other. Make sure you keep this in mind whenever you find yourself in one!
Recognize, however, that most families will have arguments and differences. And it's perfectly natural. It only becomes a concern when disputes and arguments get violent or when abuse is involved. If this is the case, please seek assistance from a trusted someone who can assist you and your family.
Here are some examples of fights and disagreements between members of a family:
Families fight to resolve issues between themselves. For example, if one family member has been misbehaving, others may want to teach them a lesson by having their own party without them. This is called "having an affair" or "shunning". The person being shamed/scolded needs to know they're not alone in this conflict.
Families fight to defend themselves against attack. For example, if a family member is threatening another with harm, they would fight to protect themselves.
Families fight to obtain advantages. For example, if one family member has a special skill that another would like to use to benefit themselves or their family, they would fight to keep this talent within the family.
Families fight for territory or resources. If there is no clear leader within a family, they might fight to determine who will take charge. Or they could fight over money or goods such as food or shelter.
Every family is at war. Families fight so they can reach consensus and move forward together.
Family arguments can be about many different things. Maybe one of your parents wants something done a certain way and the other doesn't feel like doing it that way. Maybe one of them feels like they aren't being taken seriously or felt ignored when they needed to be spoken to. Whatever the case may be, families need to talk through their differences and come to an agreement so they can move forward as a unit.
Arguments are bound to happen within families. Sometimes people don't want to deal with their issues head on, so they will instead release their anger by attacking someone else. This is often called "acting out" and can sometimes lead to more problems than what it solved in the first place. But despite how ugly or destructive they may be, arguments are a part of life for families to get through.
People love to tell stories about their families. Whether these stories are true or not makes no difference; people enjoy talking about them either way. So if you want to know more about how your family operates, just ask around. Someone will probably want to talk about it.
It is natural for families to disagree and have conflicts, but for certain families, these disagreements may become poisonous.
When things get too far beyond disagreement and into battle scenes, we say that family life has become dysfunctional. Fighting and violence are signs that a family problem has reached the point of being intolerable for one or more members. Sometimes an incident such as this can be the first sign that something is wrong in the family environment. Other times it can be the last straw for someone who has been struggling with issues of acceptance and love within the family.
Family dysfunction can affect anyone in the family, but it usually takes one of two forms: active-active or passive-passive. In an active-active family, there are two people who take turns being angry with each other. They do not respect each other's feelings and will often attack the person right before them like a boxer who knows he is going to get hit anyway so why not strike back first? This type of behavior is common among siblings who grow up without proper role models or attention from their parents. Siblings often find themselves competing with each other for their parents' love and admiration. When they fail to win this competition, they feel humiliated and act out their anger by arguing frequently or even fighting.
Family strife is common. It can even be beneficial! However, if you and your family are always arguing, it may be out of control. These three warning signs can assist you in recognizing family conflict that has developed into an unhealthy pattern, allowing you and your loved ones to get back on track.
Avoid these five ways people sabotage their relationships with each other.
1. You argue over the same things all the time. If you find yourself arguing about the same topics over and over again, maybe you should talk about what's going on for you personally? Does something happen at work or with your partner's family that might be causing them to feel attacked again? Are you trying to force your opinions on others? Maybe you should both take a step back and think about what is happening around this topic, who is doing or saying what, and why?
2. You hate seeing your partner/child/friend hurt emotionally. When someone we love feels pain, it is impossible not to feel it too. Unfortunately, some people choose to express their emotions differently from how you do; they might yell, scream, or push you away when you try to help them deal with their feelings. If this happens regularly, perhaps it's time to have a conversation with them about how you can support one another better? Or, if there is a specific event that triggered this behavior, then you should discuss it together once it has passed.
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